Demi Lovato Tells All in "Dancing With The Devil"

Illustration is based off of several different album covers for Demi Lovato's "Dancing With the Devil... The Art of Starting Over". Illustration by Naomi Ruiz | The Corsair

Demi Lovato's YouTube Original Docuseries, "Dancing With The Devil," subsequently premiered each of the four episodes from March 23 to April 6 on the popular YouTube website. Lovato takes viewers on an emotional journey as they delve into the events leading to their drug overdose in July 2018. The singer matured a lot over the years that on May 19, 2021, Lovato came out as non-binary and now uses they/them pronouns.

Lovato tells of their struggle to deal with the anxiety of being required to constantly maintain the portrayal of a perfect celebrity image, even while behind closed doors.

Episode one, titled "Losing Control," references the restrictive ways in which Lovato's previous management team handled them and how it caused them to relapse into drug and alcohol use after 6 years of sobriety. Their management team's restrictions were extreme, including scenarios like giving them only watermelon cake on their birthdays - because they were controlling their weight, and keeping them from contact with anyone they felt was not practicing complete sobriety.

Samantha Schmidt, a Santa Monica College (SMC) student majoring in social work, liked the docuseries and related to the part where the singer was on a controlled diet. "I remember my parents were like that with me, all [I] wanted was just to eat peacefully... So it makes sense that all of these restrictions [were] building up so much anxiety and [misery] in [them]," Schmidt said.

Some portions of this docuseries are graphic and eyeopening. The following paragraph describes one of Lovato's experiences with sexual trauma, and may be triggering for some.

"5 Minutes From Death," episode two, goes in-depth about the night Lovato overdosed. In a heartbreaking testimony, Lovato confesses that they were also sexually assaulted by their drug dealer that night after they fell unconscious from the drugs he brought them. Their body reacted so severely to the overdose, it caused them to have three strokes and a heart attack.

For some fans, it is eye-opening to watch Lovato talk about the repercussions they suffered from the overdose. Their current circumstances that they have to live with is brutal — such as not being able to drive a car due to blind spots.

Episode three, "Reclaiming Power," reveals how Lovato met with their former drug dealer after their overdose and assault, in an attempt to take back the power they felt they'd lost. This is a powerfully relatable scenario for sexual assault survivors who feel that they are powerless because of their abusers.

In the fourth and final episode, "Rebirthing," Lovato talks about why they broke off their 2020 engagement to actor Max Ehrich, and their current journey of recovery and reinventing themselves. In a vulnerable moment, Lovato teared-up, anticipating judgement, because they said that they currently smoke weed and drink in moderation.

"Dancing with the Devil" did a great job of humanizing Lovato and eliciting emotions from the viewers. Starting over on their own terms has helped Lovato to evolve and become self-aware. They hope that this project will encourage recovering addicts to do the same for themselves.

Visit samhsa.gov for information and support on addiction.